Look, Mart, I know I said I wasn't going to go shopping and I didn't go anywhere near the Trafford Centre. This old thing, christ, I've had its aaaaaages, since the 80's, can't you tell from the body con look?!
Herve Leger? Is it heck. It's Top Shop! You've seen it on Net-a-porter? You've checked my email? How could you?!
What do you mean £6,546 is a bit excessive for a bank holiday weekend night out with the girls? Do you know nothing about fashion, about investment shopping? Don't you know it's a classic?
Yeh, yeh, I'm dreaming, I will be rocking the skinny jeans and top look as usual, and Cheryl will be pictured in this dress in Grazia in a few weeks. Bitch.